When a friend asked me to nominate his Godson for a nationwide high school leadership award, I was happy to accommodate. Impressed by the young man’s community service record, as well as his academic and musical accomplishments, I set out to compose the recommendation letter. Easy.
When it came to the demographic application, my friend was able to supply the candidate’s birth date, home address and phone number, school name and address. No problem.
“What’s his email?” I asked. “I need that, too.”
Promising to check, my friend soon got back to me. “Tuba Beast.”
“What?” I asked. “Is this a joke?”
My friend assured me it was not. I assured him there was no way I was submitting a nomination for a highly competitive national adolescent leadership award for someone who self-identified as a “Tuba Beast.”
“Please find out his mother’s email address. I’ll use hers. Surely it will be more dignified.”
Another quick check, and my friend supplied her handle: “Dragon Lady.”
“No problem,” I said. “I’ll stick with Tuba Beast.”
Ergo…the resulting… five-word-Beast-poem, in response to Michelle Barnes’ challenging invitation.
p.s. Tuba Beast neither “won” nor “honorably mentioned.”
Moral: Beware a Beastly ID.